So a friend of mine was having a casual conversation
with me about how she pissed her man (boyfriend) off and
the guy punched the wall right in front of her. And she
giggled “men are so predictable” So I sat her down and
gave her a lecture that something is wrong. That there
goes the sign in front of her right there. If you get
married, he will punch your face. I went straight to the
point. My girl was like noooooo. Shebi he was just mad.
Now my question is where do you draw the line? A lot of
women (well according to research) always see the signs
before it actually happens. Is extreme to assume a man
that punches the wall might eventually punch your face?
That was how it started with my son's father until he
put his hands on me. I am telling you when you see those
red flag, do not ignore them. I ignored them and was sorry
Thanks for being candid with your personal experience.
I really appreciate it as it serves for lessons for some
of us out here.
It depends on how she pissed him off. Women typically
internalize ish, we men don't, we gotta let it out. Punching
a wall don't mean he will later punch her face because
they married. Showing anger is natural, beating is not.
But the truth is, if a guy punches the wall while you
are still dating, who says he won't dent your face after
u marry him? Again, note that most abused women will tell
u they say the signs but ignored it. Basic So the
signs are punching the wall? really, didn’t realize psychoanalysis
was one of your forte. what about the guy who gets upset
and he grabs his palms in anger? That tells you what?
The guy is human, truth is a woman is more likely to throw
objects and ish out of anger. Mr. Smith The real
issue is controlling his anger on the guys part and knowing
what buttons to push on the woman’s part. If this dude
is quick to run to the basement to hit the punching bags
would it be different than punching the wall? If you ask
me, punching a wall is also a sign she pushed a button
she prolly shouldn't have. Now if there are a lot of those
buttons then she might be wise to re-evaluate their relationship.
What nonsensical crap. The guy who lets out steam one
way or the other is better than the guy who keeps it all
bottled up in him cos one day when he is overwhelmed and
he lets it all out, chances are that he wont be hitting
the wall. Abuse is not only physical. Is it alright to
respond to emotional abuse with physical abuse? If women
were stronger than men, there will be worse cases of abuse
in society. Women know they are not as strong as men,
so they try desperately to break him down, they call him
bitch, they say he is weak and a lot of them even hit
the guy first and when he responds appropriately, they
term him the abuser. Any woman that lays a finger on any
man deserves to be beaten silly. Thats my philosophy.
I hold a similar philosophy: "I don't beat/spank women
(outside the bedroom) but if you lay your hands on me
first (or hurl sumn at me), all bets are off." Don't mean
I'll respond by beating her, but that guarantee that I
won't is null & voided at that point. I make it VERY
CLEAR with every woman I've been with.
I think like Basic said it is the guy that doesn't show
any sign of anger that is the dangerous one.
Abeg no dey pay attention to these women and their lifetime
movie network stories..
So in other words, you agree that men should abuse women.
The only way a man can make himself heard is to let it
all out through his fist. Let me tell you a little something
about men that hit women. It is because they have a dick
the size of a toddler's own. In the case of my sperm donor,
he will not fight with men because in 3 different occasions,
I have seen his ass whopped. Now when it comes to my turn,
the nigga will raise his hands faster than the speed of
an angry bullet. Men that hit women do so because there
are some inadequacies in their life. They have bruised
egos and feel the need to hit a woman to feel superior
and mighty. Like I said, I have learnt my lesson. Any
man wey show any kind sign say he be woman beater, I go
All I'm saying is that a woman who abuses her man physically
by hitting him first deserves to be beaten silly, when
I say beaten silly I mean beaten silly. No man deserves
to be abused by women
I am also saying that a woman who emotionally abuses her
husband by calling him weak will eventually get whats
coming to her. One form of abuse isnt less serious than
I don't agree that punching the wall is necessarily a
symptom of an abusive man. It's definitely not a thing
to be proud of. Still I would rather a woman err on the
side of caution than adopt the ostrich approach. No one
deserves to be mutilated by their so-called loved one
regardless of how many buttons the woman has pushed or
how hard she pushed them.
Mr. Smith said what's the difference between punching
the wall and going to a punching bag... the difference
is that he processed the anger a bit to go elsewhere and
find a punching bag to work off some steam. When you punch
the wall right then and there, you're either trying to
intimidate the woman with you physical strength or you're
going off some base instinct. I agree that women shouldn't
engage in physical abuse by slapping him first, but by
no means should slapping her silly or returning the favor
even creep up into your head, because things can escalate
so quickly in certain situations. Don't even try to grab
her hands or anything, just leave her be.